


11. Ugly Sweaters

by InfinityIllusion



Series: On the First Day of Christmas maisumi Gave to Me... [11]
Category: Neon Genesis Evangelion
Genre: Anxiety, Crack, Dream Sequence, Gen, If you can hear any crashes or smell burning don’t worry this might just be the canon timeline, M/M, Of the “you show up someplace in your underwear” esque dream sequence, Panic, phone fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 14:53:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28547433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfinityIllusion/pseuds/InfinityIllusion
Summary: “Welcome, welcome, welcome!  Today is the start of the first NERV Christmas Special!  Today, our intrepid pilots will be facing a new kind of challenge!”
Relationships: Background Ikari Shinji/Nagisa Kaworu
Series: On the First Day of Christmas maisumi Gave to Me... [11]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2075151
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	11. Ugly Sweaters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [maisumi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/maisumi/gifts).



> I have no idea why this happened.

* * *

Misato-san raps the mic a few times muttering, “Is this thing on?”Given the scream that echoes through the sound system, it is.

Shinji has a bad feeling about this.

“Alright!” Misato-san chirps, recovering swiftly for having her eardrums assaulted, “Let’s get started!”

She turns to face a suspicious camera set up near the center front of the stage that Shinji and the other pilots were ordered to appear at earlier this morning.The message had also told them to put on their plug suits, so Shinji had thought they would be doing more tests today...but apparently not.

“Welcome, welcome, welcome!Today is the start of the first NERV Christmas Special!With me today are our five lovely pilots who will be our main contestants!

“A quick recap for all our fans tuning in: first is Ayanami Rei, of the Prototype-00 Eva!Next to her is Ikari Shinji, 01’s pilot!Up next is Asuka Soryuu-Langley, in 02!Next is Suzuhara Touji from 03, for everyone who forgot the poor guy!Suzuhara-kun, give the camera a wave?”

Suzuhara-kun looks torn between annoyance, anger, embarrassment, and awe that Misato-san is asking him to do something, but he does give a wave of his casted arm from his place to Asuka’s left.

Shinji still feels terrible about what happened with Suzuhara-kun — actually, he didn’t even know Suzuhara-kun was still alive until he wheeled onto the stage....

Shinji needs to apologize for putting Suzuhara-kun in the hospital and nearly killing him, he really does, but the words keep sticking in different parts of his throat and the sensation makes him want to either choke or vomit.

So he just smiled weakly at him, and waved a bit before Misato-san came with the microphone to start this contest thing.

“And last but not least, our newest member piloting Eva 06, Nagisa Kaworu!”

Kaworu-kun gives a bow, which is more than Shinji accomplished.Why does Shinji have to be here?

“And now,” Misato-san says, voice turning serious, “for today’s contest, our intrepid pilots will be facing a new kind of challenge!”

Shinji gulps, clenching his fists.

“They will be competing over who.Can.Make. The. Uuuuuuuugliest sweater!!!!!!!”

Buzzers sound and balloons drop from the ceiling at Misato-san’s announcement.

Shinji is shocked and very confused.What did this have to do with Angels?Were they supposed to scare them away with ugly sweaters?Dress the Angels in ugly sweaters to bind them, somehow?

Glancing around, nobody else seems to be as confused as Shinji is.Did he mis-read the message from Misato-san?Was there a second page he hadn’t read?Some kind of attachment?Was he sent a different message?

Another buzzer sounds, and suddenly everyone is scrambling (or, really, Asuka is sprinting and everyone else is walking over) to a supply rack Shinji hadn’t realized was on stage with them.He stands to grab a sweater and supplies, too, but he has no idea what an ugly sweater is supposed to look like.What does he need?What is he making?

He’s wasting time just staring at the supplies — glitter and bells and ribbon and pompoms and glitter glue and candy and streamers and crackers and party hats and a single large grey sweater left for him.There’s hot glue guns and needles and thread and super glue and staplers for securing the various decorations to the sweater, but.

What is he going to make?

“Fifteen minutes left!” Misato-san yells, voice reverberating around the room, and Shinji panics, grabbing a handful of supplies and the last sweater and dashing back to his seat.

He still has no idea what he’s going to make, but the sweater is supposed to be ugly, right?So it maybe doesn’t matter?

(He’s really just trying to convince himself, and it’s not working, but Kaworu-kun gives him a smile when he catches his eye so maybe Shinji is panicking slightly less noticeably than he thinks he is.

Or maybe Kaworu-kun is just being nice.)

“THIRTY SECONDS!”

Shinji takes his glue gun, piles the remaining bits of decoration on it — a ribbon, a handful of pompoms, and a massive broken piece of candy — piles them all on the center of the sweater and covers the entire thing is hot glue just as Misato-san, in time with a buzzer, calls, “TIME!Put your hands in the air!”

Shinji’s panting, glancing around at the other contestants and — blinks awake to his alarm clock buzzing at him.

Kaworu-kun pokes his head in the door.“Good morning, Shinji-kun.”

“No sweater contests,” Shinji replies before burying his face in his pillow, ready to continue sleeping.

Kaworu-kun laughs. “No sweater contests? So we shouldn’t go to Misato-san’s party tonight?”

Shinji moans a “no” into his pillow, going so far as to shove it on top of his head.

He dozes off to the sound of Kaworu-kun’s laughter.

* * *

And that’s a wrap! (Real question is, though: who made the ugliest sweater?)

Kudos and comments welcome!

~Fins


End file.
